By Tony Andres
I remember this woman coming to my office with her eyes in tears and almost speechless for the events that happened the night before at her house. I ask her to take seat in the couch which she did. She took one of the pillows form the couch and embrace it like security blanket. She looked so fragile and breakable that broke my heart and make feel incapable to do something for her for the first time in my counseling profession.
I had seen this same demeanor in many victims of DV so many times and shouldn’t be surprise about this woman but this case was different, because it was too close to home. This woman was (still is) a member of my church and I had seen her with her family Sunday after Sunday at church and they appear the happiest family.
Last night..she said… my husband pushed me against the wall and hit me…he call me names and humiliated me…He was mad because I was late from work… he didn’t want to listen my explanations…It was my fault because I should call him….I always do..Don’t know why last night I didn’t do it…he’s a good men and he didn’t mean it…it was an accident.
Sounds familiar for some of you? This happened few years ago and back then I thought that this was an insulated case because a church person knows better. However, in the past 3 years many couples from church have issues with Domestic Violence. My clients coming from church had increase. They want confidentiality more than anything. The problem is hidden in the church and pastors and Sunday school teachers need to address this issue that hurts so many families.
God loves everybody and forgive all of us but the rhetorical question is; is God ok with Domestic Violence among his people? People believe that is ok to suffer abuse in silence and they have the guts to mention the Bible to backup their beliefs. However, the churches, pastor, ministers in general don’t want to talk about this issue because they are afraid people will be offended. We have a responsibility to God, to the people we pastor and to society.
Tony Andres
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